Titas de Bacolod

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Dear Tita : My brother is gay

Dear Tita,

I am a college student in one of the universities here. We are a very close family with my parents and four siblings – two girls and two boys. My problem concerns my brother Gino, our youngest, who is in high school. He is the cutest, so good-looking, clean-cut and lovable. Growing up, he was very close to my sister Emma and me, and we were over-protective with him. He wasn’t as close to our brother, Roy, who is very much into sports. Gino didn’t go for the rough and tumble of basketball and taekwondo which Roy loved.

I never suspected anything amiss until recently, when Gino came home with his shirt torn and his nose bleeding. We were so concerned that I immediately decided to investigate. It was then I found out that the boys in his school were picking on Gino because they called him “Agi! (gay).” I was shocked. I tried to observe Gino closely and I started seeing things that almost confirmed my suspicions. I told Emma about it and she, too, said she noticed the same things.

I don’t know how to tell our parents as I know our Papa would be shocked if he found out. Is there a cure for homosexuality?

CONCERNED SISTER

Dear Concerned Sister,

I am not aware of any cure for homosexuality. But I do know that a lot of gays are very successful in their careers. They are usually artistic and talented. And they are the most enjoyable companions you could have. I have a lot of gay friends whose company I do enjoy very much. The minute they are around, we inevitably start laughing and having the time of our lives.

This is a different world we are living in. People nowadays are more understanding and compassionate toward gays. I suggest you sit down with your parents and tell them what you know. It won’t be easy but that’s what families are for – to stick together in good times and bad. Gino might still make you proud of him one day.

TITA

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Follow me on Twitter @TitasdeBacolod

Meet The Man Who Helped Marcos Bring Negros Island To Its Knees

Negros Island was in a woeful state at the eve of the snap elections in 1986. Negros as a word was synonymous to "Crisis" in those days. For the longest time, the sugar industry, romanticized by the well-heeled landowners of Negros and Iloilo, was the prima donna of Philippine ......Read More

Monday, July 18, 2016

After Going Viral with 90 Thousand Views, Titas de Bacolod Opens Up "Hey Tita!"

#heytita, Issues

Tita did not expect the virality of yesterday's open letter of Gabie Gasataya to go crazy. It was insane really!

Now we have people messaging us with their problems via the Send Message button on the Titas de Bacolod Facebook Page ( https://www.facebook.com/lastitasdebacolod/ ) .

So now, as the "Tita Mayor", I am opening up "Hey Tita!".

"Hey Tita!" is a venue for all who love Bacolod to send in their questions on life, love, and anything that you might want to share or seek advice on. We will try our best to respond in a timely manner but please remember, we are Titas. Daw mahinay, hinay na ang amon kamot mag type.

So Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, Lovers of Bacolod, Send in your messages via our Facebook Page. ( Please do not message Titas de Bacolod Facebook Account )

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Follow me on Twitter @TitasdeBacolod

Meet The Man Who Helped Marcos Bring Negros Island To Its Knees

Sunday, July 17, 2016

Bacolod Congressman's Daughter Sends Open Letter To Dad

Bacolod, Issues

Hinablos Gabie Gasataya used social media yesterday to call the attention of her biological dad, Congressman Greg Gasataya in relation to child support. In her post, the Canada-based Gabie said, :

(the reason i asked for child support is that i'm going to university this Fall. My program will cost me $50,000 by the end of 4-5 years which has to be paid starting 6 months after graduation. i was hoping to be spared of the huge debt -- even to minimize it with help from the congressman - my "dad" who has been champion of education in bacolod).

An open letter to Congressman Greg Gelvosa Gasataya
Bacolod City, Philippines

Dear Congressman Gasataya,

Hello! This is Gabie, your biological daughter whom you have neglected in the last 15 years or so. I thought I would let you know that I have successfully finished high school here in Canada, through hard work and perseverance and by the grace of God and my family’s support, my mom, step dad or uncle and half-brother. My highest mark was in my Writer’s Craft class where I got 91% and so I hope that mark is reflected in this letter.

Though I bear your name and your blood runs in my veins, you have never been a father to me. I am now 18, and about to start a new chapter in my life in university. It’s a whole new world to explore and I’m excited and nervous at the same time. But before I start this new chapter, I feel the need for closure on what you did and didn’t do when I reached out to you earlier this year.

Congressman Gasastaya (I’m sorry but I cannot even call you “father”) when I left the Philippines in 2009, you broke my heart when you didn’t show up to say goodbye. My mom has arranged for us to meet for the last time because she knew it will be years again before I will be able to see you. But you stood me up at the last minute for some flimsy reason of having a meeting out of town. My 11-year-old mind didn’t understand why you couldn’t make it. I remember holding back the tears as I asked my mom why… but she didn’t have any answers for me.

In my last seven years here in Canada, I haven’t received a single phone call from you… not one Christmas card nor a birthday card. I am Gabie Gasataya, daughter of my mother, step-daughter of my uncle, sibling to my half-brother, granddaughter to my nana, grandpa and lolo… I am Gabie Gasataya, daughter of the universe, but not yours. I stopped asking why a long time ago. I know that dwelling on it will only screw me up. I am smart enough to keep that thought sealed in the deep recesses of my brain.

But, where our father-daughter relationship stops, your legal responsibility does not. As a member of the newly installed Philippine Congress, I know you have full understanding of family law. But even with that understanding, you have clearly and deliberately abandoned your obligation to me by not providing child support. You did so only in 2012 and 2013 when you sent $100-$150 from time to time which you abruptly cut off. Back then, my mom asked you for child support knowing it was only a matter of time before I go to university. Your financial situation has significantly improved that time after being elected into public office a number of times already.

Before my 18th birthday earlier this year, I told my mom I will ask you again for child support because it is my right as your biological child. I was also burdened with the thought of finishing university with a $50,000 student loan. My mom found a lawyer in Bacolod to represent me and an undertaking was drafted for you to sign. The undertaking stated that you swear to pay a monthly child support until I finish university. But you never signed the undertaking. On April, 2016, the child support that you started sending on January, 2016 stopped. Similar to what you’ve done in 2013, you cut me off without any explanation.

After this, I know that the next logical thing is to push through with my child support case to compel you to fulfill your responsibility. Believing in the justice system, I know that the court can compel you to act responsibly. What an irony when your campaign slogan in the recent elections said that you champion education for the poor. And here I am, your own flesh and blood, and you intentionally cut me off. You became every poor student’s champion, except mine, your own daughter. You are sending your step-daughter to one of the most expensive universities in the Philippines -- and yet you have abandoned me.

When it was brought to your attention that I am pursuing the child support case, you and 3 of your political friends and donors contacted my mom so I won’t pursue the case. On an internet phone conference with my mom, your political friends offered to pay for my child support in the amount of 2 million pesos on your behalf. They told my mom that they are doing it because it is the right thing to do. They said your second wife is preventing you from sending the child support so they will do it as a favor to you. While you barely said a word in the phone conference you thanked your friends and told them you owe them one. You and your friends then told my mom to delete all the negative posts she wrote on Facebook against you, Mr Congressman Gasataya. Afterwards, you asked my mom how much I needed for the first year and you told her that your friends will take care of everything. Your friends asked us to drop the child support case because they will take care of me. And then you Congressman Gasataya told us your group will send $4000 by the end of May, 2016 to cover for the university deposit.

The month of June, 2016 came and went and you and your friends have forgotten about our conversation/ agreement. Once again I became a victim of your schemes. Your political friends were worried that your name will be tainted and your transition from the city government to congress will be a rough one with a child support case on your head so you stopped me from pursuing the case with another false promise… another lie. Should I have expected anything less from you?

I have applied for a student loan which has to be paid when I finish my university. I know my mom has my back and she will do everything to help me in my new journey. But it would have been a huge help, if you had championed my education too – in the same way that you had championed the education of the poor students of Bacolod.

It was wrong for me to think you had the decency to help me since you are now doing better than 10 years ago when you were just starting in your political career. Congratulations Mr. Gasataya! You are now a true-blue politician who can deceive and play on the hopes and future of an 18-year-old girl like me. I am dismayed that you have lost your humanity when it comes to me.

Somehow, I thank you for opening my eyes... that people like you become less human and more greedy with more power in your hands. How you treated me with false promises, lies and deception is a real reflection of who you are. I cannot imagine how you credit your victories to the Glory of God and profess to be a good Christian when you can do this to me.

This letter is my closure. I want you to know how I feel. I am dismayed. When before I felt robbed of a relationship with you, now I feel disgust of what a politician you have become. I want the people you serve to know who you really are. You do not serve them, but you serve the interests of your political friends. I want your President to know who he is working with -- an irresponsible father, someone who owes favor to political friends, someone who has strings attached. Thank you for the bitter life lessons. I have learned to be brave and strong, to believe in myself and my capabilities. I asserted my rights. I took a stand. But I am just a girl. I do not have your elaborate schemes of deception. I do not have your resources. But this here, is my payment and my closure – to expose you for who you really are.

Just a girl,
Gabie Gasataya

Cc: President Rodrigo Duterte
Philippine President

National media – GMA, ABS, Philippine Daily Inquirer, Bacolod Media, People of Bacolod

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Meet The Man Who Helped Marcos Bring Negros Island To Its Knees

Saturday, April 30, 2016

From Twinkling April 29, 2016 : A Woman Nobly Planned

People, Spotlight

This came from Tita Ninfa Leonardia's column in the Visayan Daily Star, April 20, 2016 .

How many times have I started to write this column since Monday? After starting a sentence, I would stop, start another one, and then another, and finally write something else, something that would not cause tears to fall on the machine, and have me bawling again. I admitted that I was in a terrible stage of denial, because I did not want to write about something that had caused such shock and grief as what I felt Monday night.

***

My sister Perla and I had just been having our regular medical check-ups, and having to see two doctors in one afternoon had us cooling our heels for a total of almost four hours, including the stop at the pharmacy to get the prescriptions filled. It was while we were on our way to the STAR office that I got a text message from Dr. Ver Lacson, who was in Manila, informing that our dear friend Ivy Visitacion was in a bad state, at the hospital Intensive Care Unit, at that! I immediately wanted to rush to the hospital, but my sister reminded me that we were already late for work, and I had still a lot of articles to edit, as well as my column to write.

***

That was almost 8 o'clock already, so I realized she was right. But I still planned to go to the hospital, no matter how late we left the office. It was only after a few minutes, I think, when Carla came rushing down looking grim, saying it was John Orola on the phone, and he was afraid to talk to me. What else could I think? It took a long time before either John or I could be coherent enough to talk about what happened. Without words, I understood what his call meant, as we communicated with our sobs and hiccups.

***

How could either of us believe that Ivy, our glamorous, ever available, intelligent, talented and constant companion at socials, religious activities, club affairs, outings, and all kinds of activities, always glowing, impeccably made up, with not a blonde hair out of place, be gone? How can we stand not being able to call, or get a call from her in the wee hours of the morning when she caught a piece of news on TV she thought we would be interested in? Or some harmless gossip about people we both know?

***

Although she grew up in Dumaguete and came to Bacolod only later, it seems we have known each other forever. Our careers had parallels, too. While I was involved in the print media, she was in radio. We were two girls trying to get a foot into the field formerly monopolized by men. At about the same time, she became president of the local Kapisanan ng mga Brodkasters sa Pilipinas, while I headed the Negros Press Club. That was why I always got invited to KBP affairs and she to the NPC gatherings.

***

I left Bacolod to work in Makati and was gone for some six years, but when I returned to Bacolod, I got involved in press affairs again. We were able to renew ties once more, until the time when she gave up her radio work, which was near the time the DAILY STAR was born. For years, I cajoled her into writing for the STAR, but she always said writing was not her forte. I didn't believe her, and persisted, until she gave in. Later she told me how much she enjoyed writing “Behind the Scenes”, and how grateful she was that I “forced” her to write. Soon I noted that she had been giving good advice to radio fans, an asked her if she could do a “Tell Your Tita” column in the paper. It became a hit immediately. Even men would comment on it, and it tickled her.

***

For the DAILY STAR's 34 th anniversary, she said she could not get up because of severe arthritic pains. I worried about her because she had also told me that her doctor had already called her a “walking time bomb” because of her erratic blood pressure. But, as her son, Pastor Gary, admitted yesterday, his Mom loved to eat. Although we kidded her about her increasing weight, she didn't mind. She was one who could take any teasing with aplomb, but warned us that once she had chased someone down Lacson Street, in front of their studio then, with a kitchen knife! Guess who?

***

How could one talk or write calmly about such a friend? Her son told me that she had asked him recently to do something she wanted for my brother Bing, of whom she was very protective. Ah, we will miss our regular Saturday dinners at L'Fisher where the waiters already memorize our favorite dishes. Although I know she is now happy with her Saviour, how can we, her friends, not continue to miss this multi-talented woman, and wonderful mother to her children? Dearest Ivy, we will all miss you so!*

Thursday, April 14, 2016

Behind the Scenes - April 14, 2016 : Christian's Birthday Bash

Behind the Scenes with Ivy Visitacion

There was an air of joyful anticipation at the birthday bash thrown by Dr. Ver Lacson for Christian Gustilo, 26, at his sprawling residence.

When I arrived, the aroma of irresistible scrumptious dishes wafted from the kitchen. A huge lechon dominated an entire wall of the dining area. I peeped at the chafing dishes on the buffet and was delighted to find my favorite party fare all spread out, ready for the evening's “attack”.

It was so nice to see old friends and new acquaintances gathered at the dining table, filling the air with laughter, jokes and the latest burning issues of the day.

My balikbayan friend, Malu, came with beautiful young members of her family. Everyone was impressed with the tall and golden-skinned Ena Velasco, Miss Mandaue 2015. They said she should have entered the Bb Pilipinas beauty contest as her exotic looks would surely captivate the audience and the judges. She even exuded the “X” factor needed to be a winner.

Birthday celebrator Christian was all over the place, seeing to it that the guests, especially his barkada, were having a great time. Dr. Ver was rhapsodizing about how much they enjoyed watching “Les Misérables” at plush Solaire in Manila. The cost of the tickets was (hold your breath) eight thousand pesos per person!

Everyone enjoyed the gastronomic treat and previous diet resolutions were quickly forgotten as we feasted on succulent huge prawns delicately bathed in lemon butter sauce. The chicken curry special dish ala Ver was simply superb.

Fresh fruits of all colors dazzled the eyes and delighted the palate. The dessert table was groaning with mouth-watering fruit salad and various cakes and pastries. Wotta feast! *

Thursday, April 7, 2016

Thursday, April 07, 2016

Behind the Scenes - April 7, 2016 : A Wild Live Love Party

Behind the Scenes with Ivy Visitacion

Over a thousand fitness enthusiasts from the Negros Island Region, Cebu and Iloilo filled the St. John's Institute activity center during the staging of what is considered as one of the biggest Zumba parties staged in Negros Occidental in recent memory.

The “Live Love Party” event started with a motorcade in the morning. Fabulous floats represented by various Zumba groups added attraction to the activity. G2D won as best float, while the muse of Panaad NGC Body Jammers, Vergie Amago, was chosen as Ms. Zumba Shaolin Oil.

The float competition was participated in by Danzfit, Ayala Angels, Menlo Zumba, G2D, Hataw sa Lagoon, and Gaisano Zumba group.

The “Live Love Party”, led by lone Filipino Zumba education specialist Prince Paltu-ob and his better half, Madelle Paltu-ob, gave Zumba enthusiasts a two-hour energy-packed and fun-filled fitness party that was jam-packed from start to finish.

Madelle said this is one of the LLP provincial gigs they had where she has felt so much warmth and passion from participants. She added she was so inspired to give her all, seeing how happy the enthusiasts were and how much they love Zumba. It was a live experience indeed with terrific modern production - from huge Led wall, confetti blast and smoke blast that made every enthusiast feel like they are in a live Asap show!

The energy was electrifying. Major raffle prizes, like trips to Manila, added excitement to the party. The Paltu-ob couple was joined by the LLP crew, composed of Zumba jammer Marlex Pagunalan, who is based in New Zealand, Mark, Che and Gail. With them also were Manila Zin RJ Areja and Cebu's Alex Estrada.

Local licensed Zumba instructors under ZiNegros and those from Dumaguete and Iloilo added spice to the fitness party.*

Thursday, April 07, 2016

Why Is MIAA GM Honrado So Unexpendable?

#disgusting, Issues

After the black out in NAIA Terminal 3 last week, it puzzles us why MIAA General Manager Honrado can still hoodwink all of us into an assertion that he is still the best person for the job at the world's worst international airport.

The DOTC Secretary is of no help as well pinning the blame on bad luck. Bad luck?!!!...Secretary Abaya of all people should be the perfect person to understand what went wrong being a mechanical engineer. As a person adept with numbers and statistics the probability of this happening and an ensuing generator breakdown could have surely been avoided and not left to luck. Duhhh.

Back to Honrado. We are starting off with the label that NAIA is one of the worst international airports in the world. With that setback, I ask, "Why didn't we field the best there is to handle this?". In the Senate hearings on the Laglag Bala issue, it was very clear on TV that Honrado does not comprehend the impact of his role as MIAA GM and the responsibility which comes along with it. It is also evident that the job is way above Honrado's league. As a housewife, I even wonder if he can manage the frenzy I handle each day here at home. Seriously. PNoy should have gotten a woman for the job if there was fixing to be done.

So why is he still there and so unexpendable? My simple mind can only think of one thing. That he could be protecting the web of unaudited income which goes around the entire NAIA terminals. Think of concessions, all the unnecessary rituals concessionaires even have to deal with before they finally get their concessions. And where does the money trail lead back to?

I pity sobrino Mar. All of this negative flak is hurting his campaign for President. For all the travel-loving Filipinos who find joy in taking advantage of the cheap flights, they cannot take another six more years of this ineptitude which results into obvious inconvenience.

I said that because yesterday, in convincing relatives to go for Mar, I received piercing words which went into me like a hot knife into a stick of butter. "Tita, I am sorry but I cannot accept another six years of this kind of incompetent leadership".

The truth really hurts.

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Follow me on Twitter @TitasdeBacolod

Meet The Man Who Helped Marcos Bring Negros Island To Its Knees

Thursday, March 31, 2016

Behind the Scenes - March 31, 2016 : A Montilla Family Gathering

Behind the Scenes with Ivy Visitacion

It was truly a night to remember when the Montilla clan held a family gathering at Lina's Alfresco Dining in Bacolod, that is owned by a relative, where family members from all over gathered for an evening of good food, excellent wine, and renewed bonding.

The turnout was fantastic. Relatives, who had not seen each other for so many years, happily greeted each other with beso beso y abrazo, speaking in Spanish, English and Ilonggo, all at once.

This is one of the old families of Negros Occidental who, through the years, have made a name for themselves in various fields; politicians, sugar barons, academe, medicine, businessmen (and women), beauty queen, etc. They are known as the “crème de la crème, the “de buena familia” of the province.

I happened to be at the party with my “ladies who lunch” group, composed of Ditas and Cristy Montilla and Leda Peña. These Montilla ladies insisted that I come with them to see for myself how the family gets together. And true enough, one could see the genuine affection and respect they have for each other despite any minor differences in the past. This goes to show that “blood is thicker than water”.

I was told that this gathering is in preparation for the grand Montilla family reunion to be held sometime in the near future. It was, indeed, a most pleasant experience to be in the midst of Negrense “blue-bloods”.*

Thursday, March 17, 2016

Behind the Scenes - March 17, 2016 : A Riotous Hawaiian Luau

Behind the Scenes with Ivy Visitacion

What a fun-filled evening!

The WoW (Women of Wonders) Ladies Club held its first quarter birthday celebration cum induction of new members recently at Bacolod’s Ambience Ballroom, Pavillon Hotel, on the theme, “A Hawaiian Luau”.

The place was blooming with flowers of all colors and sizes as the ladies came wearing their most colorful Hawaiian costumes with flowers adorning their hair, wrists and beautiful leis framing their lovely faces. Everyone was in a party mood, all set to have fun. The program started with especially-prepared games, and shrieks of excitement, laughter and good-natured ribbing filled the air as the elegant ladies scrambled on the floor to find the needed items to win the fabulous prizes meticulously prepared by Baby Bonnin. What a sight they made.

Mercifully, dinner was announced and the group crowded the buffet table where scrumptious party dishes were laid out for all to enjoy. A spirited Hawaii 50 dance was performed by some members, led by Julie Carbon, which was greeted with cheers and applause. Lina Lim and her dance partner Edgard performed a passionate Argentine tango number, that was so perfectly executed that the audience insisted on an encore number which they graciously granted.

Judge Lorna Demonteverde inducted the new members, clad in her formal judge’s black toga. The new members spoke of how glad they were to be part of this exciting ladies’ group which they found to be the most fun and enjoyable. Club president Inday Pefianco thanked all those who made the evening successful.

Highlight of the evening was the ballroom dancing as members and DIs filled the dance floor, swinging, sashaying, shaking, and grooving till they dropped. Whew! Wotta night!*

Thursday, March 10, 2016

Behind the Scenes - March 10, 2016 : VMA's Vin d'Honneur

Behind the Scenes with Ivy Visitacion

“Vin d' Honneur” is the traditional way of celebrating a bountiful harvest from newly-produced and processed wine in France. It is done in the Philippines to celebrate the New Year by diplomats and foreigners during social gatherings.

For the first time, the VMA Global College celebrated its bountiful harvest for year 2016 by producing 658 students to become future professionals and businessmen in their chosen fields of endeavor.

It was an evening of glitz, glamour and beauty. The VMA Global College Graduation Ball 2016 was a glittering affair held at SMX Bacolod recently. The colors and lights of the venue set the mood of a glamorous soiree oozing with pomp and pageantry, as ladies came dressed in their formal evening gowns adorned with blings that glittered with the chandeliers. The gentlemen looked dashing and debonair in their formal suits and gala white uniforms.

Everyone looked with awe as tall and beautiful Leren Mae Bautista, Miss Tourism Queen International, walked in wearing a midnight blue formfitting gown. Another stunning lady was the very fair and delicate Sandra Prasasvinitchai, wife of the Thai ambassador to Kuwait. Other special guests were visitors from Japan, Switzerland, and local government officials.

Bautista, who stands 5 feet 9 inches tall in her stockinged feet, towered over Congressman Bing Leonardia and John Orola in her 6-inch stilettos.

Orola welcomed the guests to the reception as he reminisced about how VMA has grown from its humble beginnings to what it is now – a global college with a huge number of students. Wine was offered to the guests as they enjoyed dinner. Soprano champion Hannah Louise Gonzales thrilled the audience with her exquisite voice. A special cotillon dance number was presented by the students of VMA to delight the appreciative audience.*